I find it strange how logical depression feels, all my thoughts seem logical to me. However apparently from the outside they are not so logical. It just seems so guaranteed that my life will be shit in the future, why would anyone want to give me a job? Why would anything change from how it is now? It seems like I have discovered the truth and everyone else just hasn’t realised it yet. Ignorance is bliss I guess.
So many health professionals have described me as being “flat” what does that even mean, i’m not sure that word should even be used in any way other than to describe a surface… The first time it came up a nurse asked me “are you always this flat”, she said it as if it was a negative thing so even though I had no idea what she was talking about, I said no. I still don’t know how to answer that question.